Signs
Messages from the universe, trap in the stars or stubbing your toe.
Everything is a sign if you are crazy enough.
Yesterday, first thing I wanted to do in the morning is reach for my phone that was on a desk. As I went to reach for it, I stubbed my toe so bad I couldn't help but wonder if I should just not pick that phone up.
Yeah, I am crazy enough.
I’m an Aries
Bold, fierce, passionate, pioneers, courageous. Impatient, impulsive, hot-headed. Spend ten minutes in a room with me and I guarantee you will see most of these traits. There is absolutely no way I could have been any other star sign. Or…
In Polish, ram (Aries’ animal) translates to “baran” which is considered a mildly offensive word if directed to someone. Being a ram can go two ways…
It is a bit persuasive, though. Star signs, I mean. Once we read into ours, we sort of automatically notice these tiny bits of traits and they grow into a defining part of our personality. We give these signs definition, not the other way around.
Moreover, there are so many of these little groups of descriptive characteristics. Exhibit A: MBTI signs.
For those being happy not needing to be described all the time - MBTI is a group of 16 types of personalities, sorted into:
Extraversion (E) vs. Introversion (I)
Information Gathering: Sensing (S) vs. Intuition (N)
Decision Making: Thinking (T) vs. Feeling (F)
Lifestyle/Structure: Judging (J) vs. Perceiving (P)
I am an ENFP. For over four years now. The only constant in my life, dare I say.
And there was a period in my life where I found it the most important part of my personality. I dug deeply into my type’s analysis: friendship, career, character, strengths, weaknesses. I can’t remember anything now, but four years ago it was veeeery important. I remember though that few TV characters have this personality type (and also those I don’t particularly fancy).
Just as much as I was interested in my star sign and MBTI type, I found more and more of their traits in me. I keep on wondering, are they really there or do I just like being described? Being defined and to relate to a certain group. I give it all meaning.
I mean, everything is a sign if you are crazy enough. No matter what MBTI I would be, I am sure I would go “omg that is so me”. Sighs…
“God give me a sign if…”
If I say this and a lightning strikes nearby, I won’t be the same woman ever again.
There are stages in life where we tend to think about every single damn thing as a sign. A bird flies by- oh my God it is a sign I must not do this.
It can very quickly: scare the shit out of us, make us go nuts, overanalyze everything.
I’ve been in that stage recently. And safe to say I think I ignored one too many signs the universe served me. I pissed it off, probably.
One more straight-up ignorance from me and I will be hit in the head with a stop sign.
And don’t take me wrong. I am past all this “need to be defined by everything” phase, yet I believe in signs. Like, there is no fucking way some things “just happen”.
Honestly? I kind of fear the words “God, give me a sign…”. If something really happened, I would feel personally obliged to do the thing. It is surely a matter of faith, but also a little about the audible doubt. What the fuck, you may ask. Here’s what:
Saying “give me a sign”. It’s articulating you need guidance, needing a straight-up answer from whoever/whatever you believe in. You give in to the forces beyond you. And moreover - you know whether you want the sign or not. It’s like with flipping the coin. Halfway through, you usually know what you want to see once it falls.
If you need a sign, you just might already know what to do.
Everything is a sign if you are crazy enough.
Because sometimes, we just need to believe. We need to feel like the universe gently guides us. That there is some instructions that it wants to give us through events that it knows we will notice and think about more.
It is comforting to find signs. It gives the feeling that the world cares, it wants us to do “the right thing”. That there is some sort of advice falling from the sky. Maybe everything is a sign…
Maybe there is a reason you suddenly noticed that stop sign on your walk even though you passed it hundreds of times so far.
Maybe if you wanted to reach for your phone and stubbed your toe, some things were not meant to be done on it in the morning.
Maybe you were supposed to be born an Aries. Even if you can be the whole galaxy, all the twelve signs, you should see yourself wholly only in this one.
Or maybe we all crazy. Give me a sign if I am wrong.
Swamped in signs,
Zuzanna
Talk it out. Really.
I grew up surrounded by people with ears willing to use them to hear me. I always felt that I can come and talk to my family, sometimes to my friends. There are probably so few problems that I haven’t talked about with anyone I could count them on one hand.
